New Year's reflections

As a new year approaches, I love to reflect on the changes that have taken place in the past 365 days--both internally and externally. I don't usually make New Year's resolutions, but sometimes I make goals or just write down my expectations for the new year, and then release them all to my Loving Father.

2017 was certainly a time of momentous changes for me. Here is a summary of the hills and valleys I've seen this year:

January:

• Resigned from Genesis Healthcare 
• Traveled to Kenya with group from Wheaton Bible Church  (WBC) 

February:

• Traveled alone to Niger to work at Galmi Hospital 

March:

• Returned to USA 
• Started job with Supplemental Healthcare/ Northwestern Medicine 
• Began long-term assignment process as a missionary with SIMUSA 

April:

• Stormy was very sick; multiple trips to vet 
• Roommate moved out 

May:

• Finished my first 5K!

• Started gluten free/ dairy free diet for my health 
• Attended a family wedding and a friend's baptism 

June:

• Last day with Supplemental Healthcare 
• Attended my brother Tyler's Master's Ceremony in Philly 
• Attended my cousin's improv show in Chicago 
• Celebrated my 31st birthday 

July:

• Attended one week orientation at SIMUSA headquarters in Charlotte 
• Started job with Residential Home Health
• Visited winery in Iowa with a friend 

August:

• Started job with Brookdale Senior Living 
• Saw the best musical ever, HAMILTON, in Chicago with all of my best friends 

• Sold my condo in Warrenville
• Celebrated my friend's graduation from CNA school 
• Took family vacation to Philly and the Jersey Shore 

September:

• Line dancing fundraiser for my trip 
• Celebrated the one year anniversary of my church, Tri-Village Church (TVC), a sister campus of WBC 
• Moved in with my parents and put my things in storage
• Visited NYC with Tyler (first time) to watch our cousin's play

October:

• Attended one-week training at SIMUSA headquarters in Charlotte 
• During weeklong Missionsfest celebration, was presented at church as the first missionary to be sent overseas from TVC
• Attended my cousin's baptism
• Chick-fil-A fundraiser in Wheaton for my trip

November:

• Began Second Language Acquisition course through Wheaton College 
• Attended annual Friends for Therapeutic Equine Activities benefit dinner with my dad
• Attended PAX Unplugged convention of board games with my brother in Philly

• Celebrated Friendsgiving with high school friends (class of 2004!)

December: 

• Saw Star Wars: The Last Jedi on opening weekend in Minnesota with my friends from college
• Last day with Residential Home Health 
• Celebrated a white Christmas in Chicago with friends and family! 
• Dislocated my right knee for the third time (today...breaking news...)

Please pray with me that these trials and triumphs will work together for God's glory!

Into the darkest season, comes The Light

It's been called "the most wonderful time of the year." And while it is certainly special, this December for me has been especially difficult emotionally. I get very involved in my patients' lives, especially as I treat some of them for several months, and almost all of them have had setbacks this month: whether from illness, rehospitalization, a devastating prognosis, or just general idiopathic decline. One even passed away suddenly. And friends and neighbors are dealing with their own health struggles, loss of beloved pets, and family upheaval. It just seems like no one is very merry nor bright!

Surrounded as I seem to be by grief and sadness, I could be tempted to despair. However, as I am reminded by my favorite movie series (above) and book series (below), darkness allows you to see the light that much more clearly:

My happiness in this season has been found in everyday moments with my family, in a road trip to Minnesota with my college friends, in serving at church, in snuggling with my dog, in playing board games and going to the movies, and in buying Christmas gifts. But these things will pass away. My hope and my joy are found in The Light of the World:

One of my greatest blessings in this season is sharing with my current patients and coworkers that I am moving overseas. Although this means that I must say goodbye to them soon, they have been very encouraging about my new endeavor, and this news has opened up many spiritual conversations as they question my reasons for leaving my family and comfortable suburban life. One patient with chronic pain asked me several theological questions this week, but what she really wanted to know was, "Why is God so mad at me?" I reassured her that her chronic health problems are not a judgement for something she has or hasn't done, pointing her to passages about Paul in the New Testament and Job in the Old. She invited me to come back just to visit after I'm done working with Residential. We will pray together for her upcoming surgery (in late January) to be successful.

Let us be light and love to each other! Have a Merry Christmas! 

We are not done

I got my 2nd tattoo today. It has significant layers of meaning for me. Here's what it looks like:

I substituted the Arabic letter "ن" (pronounced noon) in the word "not" in order to show solidarity with my Middle Eastern brothers and sisters.
The motto "We are not done" comes from my Pastor, Wil Franco, at Tri-Village Church in Streamwood, who gave an impassioned (I mean, more than usual) sermon on this topic several months ago.
Here is what this means to me, in the context of the Gospel which I believe in:
1. I have been saved by Jesus, but I am not done; I am in a process of sanctification until I meet Him face to face (Hebrews 10:10, 14).
2. No one else is perfect, either, so I should extend forgiveness as He has forgiven me (Colossians 3:13).
3. We are commanded to go out and proclaim the Good News, and this won't be done until all have had a chance to hear and believe (Matthew 28:18-20, Revelation 7:9-10). Everyday, I have a part to play in that, no matter where I'm living at the time.
4. Including the Arabic letter reminds me that many people will try to kill us or imprison us, in order to stop the Truth, but ultimately, God will prevail over the enemy of darkness (Revelation 12:10-12, 7:16-17). What an encouraging hope to have!

I got the tattoo so that these important reminders will be always before me, everywhere I go!

**Edit: I should give credit where it's due: my brother in Christ, the wonderful Chris Baker, who runs Ink180 Ministry in Oswego, which helps former gang members and survivors of sex trafficking by covering their scars or tattoos without charge. I brought my idea to him and he made it into art! Thanks, Chris!**